Community Forum

A relapse on the journey toward a smoke-free life can be discouraging. You may feel disappointed, guilty, or even feel as though you have lost all the progress you made up to that point. Yet a relapse does not mean that everything has to start over. It is one of the challenges that can arise when trying to change a deeply ingrained habit.

The important thing is not to let this relapse become a reason to give up. Instead, take a moment to understand what happened: What triggered the urge to smoke? Was it stress, fatigue, a difficult emotion, a particular situation, or simply an old habit resurfacing? By reflecting on these circumstances, you can better prepare yourself for the next time.

It is also essential to speak to yourself with kindness. Instead of saying, “I failed,” you can remind yourself: “I encountered a difficulty, but I can get back on track.” Every period spent without a cigarette already represents progress. The efforts made before the relapse do not disappear; they have taught you something about yourself and about your ability to live without tobacco.

After a relapse, the most important thing is to start again as soon as possible, without waiting for the perfect moment. One cigarette does not necessarily have to turn into another series of cigarettes. You can decide that this day, this hour, or even this minute marks a new beginning.

It is also important to remember why you chose to quit smoking: for your health, your breathing, your energy, your freedom, your loved ones, your finances, or simply so that you are no longer dependent on cigarettes. These reasons can become a source of motivation when difficult moments arise.

Moving forward after a relapse means accepting that the journey is not always linear. It is not perfection that matters, but perseverance. Every time you get back up, regain confidence, and choose to keep going, you take another step toward a smoke-free life.

A relapse does not erase the progress you have made. It can become an opportunity to learn, grow stronger, and start again with even greater determination. Keep going. You got this!

Spoke too soon about the smoking dreams stopping. Dreamt last night that I was back living in Spain and moved into a house sharing with others and they were all smoking so I had one as well. Woke up in a sweat all confused for a few minutes. Part of me was happy to be smoking again and the other part horrified. The relief when I realized it had just been a dream.

Other than that nothing much to report. I was in the Canada Goose store at the weekend and spotted a beautiful grey jacket that I could use for the winter and spring here. But the price tag was just as nice at €1500! Will be a few months saving up for that but what a nice reward for my 12 months checkpoint. Ill see what I can do. Id feel like Im in Canada wearing that everyday.

Have You Found the Right Motivation Yet?

Sometimes, you know you should make changes to your nicotine usage simply because everyone around you tells you it’s bad for you. Maybe you’re worried about your health, or perhaps you feel judged when you’re the only person stepping away from the dinner table to have a cigarette.

But here’s an important question: Are any of those reasons actually motivating to you?

Finding your own reasons for wanting to reduce or quit nicotine can be an important part of your Quit journey. The more connected you feel to your motivation, the easier it can be to come back to it when you’re experiencing cravings, triggers, or difficult moments.

So, how do you find your personal motivation?
There are countless ways to explore this, but here’s one suggestion for today.

Take a moment, whether you have two minutes or thirty. Set a timer and give yourself some space to honestly explore how you feel about your nicotine use. There are no right or wrong answers, and you don’t have to convince yourself of anything.
Here are a few questions you could start with:
- What does nicotine do for me? What do I enjoy or find helpful about it?
- What do I dislike about my nicotine use?
- Does it affect my health or how I feel physically? If so, how?
- How much am I spending on nicotine each week or month? Is there something meaningful I would rather put that money toward?
- If I’m pregnant, what might reducing or quitting nicotine mean for me and my baby? What benefits matter most to me personally?
- If I changed my nicotine use, what would I hope my life looked or felt like six months from now?

There are a million questions you could ask yourself, and all of them are valid. What matters most is identifying the motivations, reasons, and goals that genuinely resonate with you and your life.

Give yourself permission to really think about them. You may want to share what you discover with someone in your support system, or you may prefer to keep it private. Both are completely okay.

One small suggestion: write your reasons down somewhere you can easily find them. Come back to them during the easier days, not only when things are difficult. And when cravings or triggers do happen, remind yourself what you decided was worth working toward.

Ultimately, you are the one making the choices about your life and your nicotine use. Your motivation doesn’t have to make sense to everyone else. It needs to mean something to you.
You’ve got this! One day at a time, one decision at a time, and one small change at a time.

How to break the hand-to-mouth habit of smoking?
 

Breaking the hand-to-mouth habit of smoking is not easy, but with some practical strategies, tools, and healthy distractions, it is completely doable. Smoking is not only about nicotine dependence; it can also become deeply connected to everyday routines: the movement of reaching for a cigarette, holding it between your fingers, bringing it to your mouth, and taking a puff. After quitting, these familiar actions can leave your hands and mouth feeling as though something is missing.

One of the simplest ways to deal with this is to replace the habit rather than simply trying to suppress it. Keep your hands occupied with something small, such as a stress ball, fidget toy, pen, knitting, drawing, or even a small object you can safely handle while watching television or talking on the phone. Having something readily available can make it easier to get through those moments when the urge to smoke appears.

Keeping your mouth busy can be just as helpful. Sugar-free gum, sugar-free mints, crunchy vegetables, or sipping water through a straw can provide a satisfying alternative to the familiar hand-to-mouth motion. Some people also find that drinking herbal tea or keeping a bottle of water nearby gives them something to reach for when a craving strikes.

It can also help to change the routines associated with smoking. If you normally smoked with your morning coffee, consider having your coffee somewhere different or taking a short walk afterward. If you usually smoked during breaks, use that time to stretch, take a few deep breaths, listen to music, or step outside for fresh air without a cigarette. Changing the routine helps break the mental connection between a particular activity and smoking.

Another useful strategy is the "delay and distract" technique. When a craving comes, remind yourself that you do not have to act on it immediately. Wait a few minutes and focus your attention on something else. Take several slow breaths, drink some water, chew gum, text a friend, or walk around the room. Cravings are temporary, and giving yourself time to ride one out can strengthen your confidence that you can handle the next one too.

It is also worth identifying your personal triggers. Stress, boredom, driving, alcohol, coffee, social situations, and being around other smokers can all bring on cravings. Once you know which situations are most difficult for you, you can prepare alternatives in advance. For example, keep gum in the car, carry a water bottle, have a stress ball at your desk, or plan a short activity for the times when you would normally take a smoking break.

Most importantly, be patient with yourself. The hand-to-mouth habit may take time to fade because it has often been repeated hundreds or thousands of times. Feeling the urge to reach for something does not mean that quitting is failing: it means your brain and routines are adjusting to a major change. Every time you respond to a craving without smoking, you are practicing a new habit and making the next craving a little easier to manage.

Quitting smoking is a process of replacing old patterns with healthier ones. You do not have to find one perfect substitute. A combination of small tools and activities, something for your hands, something for your mouth, a change in routine, and a way to manage cravings, can make the transition much more manageable. With time and practice, the need to keep your hands and mouth busy usually becomes less noticeable, and the routines that once revolved around smoking can become part of a healthier, smoke-free life.

Another Friday afternoon and heading toward another milestone this weekend - today marks 2 months and 27 days of freedom, so by the end of the weekend I will be 3 months! I still log into the site faithfully every day, so my mind is definitely not free of this curse yet. I still get inspired by others journeys and I like to feel grounded by reading all the challenges that others are experiencing because it is all very familiar. It does really help to feel "normal". Enjoy this weekend fellow quitters - one of the last of summer where I live - but I look forward to Fall and no mosquitos! Happy weekend!😎

I first smoked when i was 11 then 15 and from there I have quit only for a few months in all the years. It has been close to 40 years and now I am sick of coughing and wheezing. I decided to take medication and it has really been messing with my brain but I am determined to end my relationship with anything nicotine/smoke related. The bonus of the meds are they ended my relationship with alcohol as well. I haven't drank in 10 days and haven't smoked in 4 days. Last night and today I have been really struggling and need some support.

What a day. Went to the beach and had all my fav snacks a few pops and holly cow no smokes. This has not been easy but I know it will work this time thanks to all of your support. All of your comments and understanding is the biggest gift for me going forward. I am very grateful and feel at peace. Many thanks and I feel great from your support. I am not alone any more and I will keep everyone posted. Cheers Brad

I Won't Give Up on Myself

There may be days when quitting feels harder than you expected. Cravings can be intense, motivation can disappear, and you may question whether you are strong enough to succeed. But one thing you can choose, even on the hardest days, is this: I won't give up on myself. You don't have to have everything figured out today. You simply need to keep giving yourself another chance. 

A setback does not erase your progress. A difficult craving does not mean you are failing. Every attempt gives you a better understanding of your triggers, your habits, and what you need to succeed. Instead of asking, "Why can't I do this?" try asking, "What can I learn from this moment, and what can I do differently next time?" Be patient with yourself as you build new habits. 

Your reasons for quitting are worth protecting. Think about the mornings you want to wake up breathing easier, the activities you want to enjoy without cigarettes, the people you want to be there for, and the future you want to create. Let those reasons remind you why you started whenever your motivation feels low. 

A Promise to Yourself:

• I won't give up on myself.
• I won't let one difficult moment define me.
• I will learn, adjust, and keep moving forward.
• I will take my journey one day at a time. 
• I will keep choosing my health.

You don't need to promise yourself that quitting will always be easy. Promise yourself that you won't stop trying.

Today, give yourself another chance. Tomorrow, do it again, every time you choose to keep going, you're proving that your future is worth fighting for. 

Well 12 days with no smoke or patch. The body is feeling better, less twitches, a better appetite although still small, still not sleeping good and everyday challenges. Best thing is I have not had one. I know this may sound weird but for me now it seems I have lost track of time. A decade or so, I feel old now although my stupid brain says hey you are just 20 not 60. Body says no you are 60. I want to live free of this obsession and really live the time I have left. My sponsor Bob said to me, hey you have to look at your life as a tape measure. Not many marks left so make the best of it. I sure wish i was 12 years old and said no thanks. Many thank for all your comments seeing me through these hard days. Cheers to all of us, Brad.

When You Finish Something and Immediately Want a Cigarette

Finished cleaning the house? Cigarette.
Finished a long phone call? Cigarette.
Finished working? Cigarette.

For some people, smoking becomes the punctuation mark at the end of a task. It is the signal that says, Okay, that is done. Now I can relax. When you start cutting down or quitting, those moments can feel strangely unfinished without a cigarette.

If this sounds familiar, try creating a different way to mark the end of something. Make yourself a drink, sit outside for a few minutes, check your phone, put on a favorite song, or simply sit down and enjoy the fact that whatever you were doing is finally done.

You can still have the pause. You can still enjoy that feeling of finishing something. The cigarette was just one way you learned to mark that moment.

It can take some experimenting to find something that feels right, and at first the new routine might not feel quite as satisfying. That is okay. Old habits have had a lot of practice.

You finished the task. You earned the break. The cigarette was never the part that made the break yours.

Well I've reached the 10 month checkpoint. These milestones are coming and going now with ease. I wont say that its easy now... dont want to jinks myself but its definitely not the huge challenge it was in the earlier days of this quit. I still get the odd niggling craving but it passes quickly. Im not noticing people smoking on the street as much as I used to... and if I do, I just think, 'that used to be me' and I keep walking. The smoking dreams have stopped too. Havent had one of those in a while.

I dont think Im posting as much as I used to either. Nothing is happening or its not at the forefront of my thoughts as much anymore. Still feels nice to check in here though and give progress. And of course to cheer on those following the same path.

I think what I could say is that I have a great sense of pride for making this quit stick. So many attempts before this one to quit and never made it last. I have the 12 month checkpoint now on the horizon and I'm following Doris to get to it. Feels like entering the penthouse suite of this community to get to 1 year. We've got this.